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There's something in the air, whoa-oh

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April 20, 2010 | 10:21pm
Mood: tired/annoyed
Music: Digitalism - Pogo

Last night I booked a ticket to Thailand. I'll be there for the last week of July. I can't believe I'm going to Thailand. Shit bitches.

Classes went surprisingly well today, even my six year olds. I honestly adore my first six year old class: they're all so smart and adorable, and the "bad kids" are now only bad because they don't raise their hands to speak. My second class is more of a handful, but I seem to be getting the hang of it now. I was the mean teacher today and refused to let any of them go to the bathroom, no matter how many times they asked. Normally I let my kids go to the bathroom, but that class takes advantage of it - more than one leaves the room when I turn my back, they laugh about it, they get water instead of going to the bathroom. I'm sick of it. I'm going to keep being the mean teacher until they're tame.

After work I went and got dinner with Kylee, and we sat and talked for a couple hours. Then I went for a walk but ended up in the park with Nigel and Megan for a while. Now I'm listening to music.

Korea has really messed up my moods: I used to be so easygoing (read: I held everything in), now... well... I get annoyed easily, I snap at people, and I can be a jerk. Before I came here I never acted like this. I don't know what happened. Probably it's for the best. Holding in your emotions isn't exactly a good thing. But then again, being a bitch isn't a good way to make (and keep) friends. But holding in your emotions isn't either. I don't know. I just figure-- I shouldn't need to hold everything in just to make sure everyone is nice and happy and likes me. If you do something that pisses me off, I think I have a right to let you know exactly what you're doing wrong. Then again, making snarky comments isn't exactly letting you know what you're doing wrong - it's just me being a jerk. Ugh. I need to stop analyzing myself and go to bed.




I don't think it's right, lettin' love ruin my life
and I don't think it's wrong, gettin' a little revenge in a song
Solid Gold - Who You Gonna Run To?


but lately I've been getting upset a lot
but no one really understands how bad it gets
Dinosaur Pile-Up - Love Is A Boat And We're Sinking


I said I wouldn't but I think I just might
I know I shouldn't but it's Saturday night
Maxi Geil! & Playcolt - Making Love In The Sunshine


No, you don't move me anymore
and I'm glad that you don't
...
but I won't stop falling like raindrops
because I like it when you lose control
Yeasayer - O.N.E.


you come on like a drug, I just can't get enough
I'm like an addict coming at you for a little more
and there's so much at stake, I can't afford to waste
I never needed anybody like this before you
Garbage - Temptation Waits


I had some 40z on my mind when I woke up this morning
I was sick of fancy drinks from the bitches I'd been boning
Gravy Train!!!! - Sippin' 40z


I can make you sing
and I can make you shout
...
It don't make a difference,
no it don't make a difference anyway
Two Door Cinema Club - Hands Off My Cash, Monty


My beard grew down to the floor and out through the door
of your eyes, begonia skies like a sleephead
Passion Pit - Sleepyhead


Where did you get those knees
That hit the floor and bring out the best in me
...
and how I long for your four limbs
and long to sleep amongst their bends
and how I long to assist the burning that rushes to your hips
Kurran & the Wolfnotes - Four Limbs


you said our pen's out of ink
I don't know if it's true, it depends how you think
Russian Futurists - Our Pen's Out of Ink

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Comments {4}

Bedlam boys are bonny

(no subject)

from: mad_maudlin
date: April 20, 2010 06:34pm (UTC)
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Yay Thailand! Hope the political situation there calms down enough for you to go.

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Adam

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from: aodh
date: April 20, 2010 11:48pm (UTC)
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Yay Thailand!

Yeah, I'm a little concerned about the political situation... but...if need be I'll just avoid Bangkok (even though my flight goes straight there). If the airport is closed I'll just go to Malaysia. No big deal. Well, sort of a big deal, but w/e.

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Captain Kirby, a.k.a. Aranelle

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from: _kirbylicious_
date: April 21, 2010 04:35am (UTC)
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Holding in your emotions isn't exactly a good thing. But then again, being a bitch isn't a good way to make (and keep) friends. But holding in your emotions isn't either. I don't know. I just figure-- I shouldn't need to hold everything in just to make sure everyone is nice and happy and likes me. If you do something that pisses me off, I think I have a right to let you know exactly what you're doing wrong. Then again, making snarky comments isn't exactly letting you know what you're doing wrong - it's just me being a jerk.

So this? Kind of describes the epiphany I had after I graduated college. I used to be very doormat-ish, and was really good at letting people walk all over me. Then (and I will forever blame/thank retail work for this) I realised that I'm better off standing up for myself. You know, to a point.

IMO, if people can't handle you being honest about being annoyed, they're not worth keeping around. Being a bitch isn't necessarily a good thing, but it's not always bad either. I know your situation's a lot different than mine because you have to be around these people practically 24/7, but...I don't know. I think I had a point in there somewhere. Embrace your inner bitch?

Also, we need to chat again sometime. When is generally good for you?

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Adam

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from: aodh
date: April 21, 2010 01:12pm (UTC)
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I've always been a bit of a doormat, but I'm trying to change my ways... it's taken a few decades but w/e. I'm getting there.

I agree, if people can't handle me being honest then screw them. But... I still do that "I want people to like me so I'm going to be inoffensive and go with the flow!!!" thing.

tbh mornings (in Korea) work best for me... 7-10pm in Chicago. I'm always online at this time, just invisible. just send me a message, I don't always see if people come online...

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