November 21st, 2016

visor sneer

기말페이퍼 기간 시작...... ㅠ

Summary of the last week: last week was shit, part two. I failed 2/3rds of my comprehensive exams (passed one though!). I didn't have to get lasered at the doctor, but since I'm not getting better, I got this godawful ointment that may or may not work (cross your fingers). Things looked up on Friday; went with Kay and Nick to Garosu-gil, went to the Joan Cornella exhibition (not worth it- saw everything for free online), got delicious food at Brooklyn the Burger Joint (jalapeno burger and peanut butter and brownie shake), and then watched Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (quite good!). Saturday I met Ted in Hongdae for coffee. That's about it.

I've been having a lot of issues making myself get started studying recently. The thing is, I have roughly seventy thousand (read: four) final papers due this semester, plus half a billion presentations (read: four papers, otherwise unrelated to the final papers) to get done in the weeks before finals.

I've always had trouble studying. Last semester was awful because I was so lazy I didn't actually get started on my three final papers until 2 weeks before the end of the semester. I greatly regretted that. This time around, I've been planning all semester to be on top of my studies, to do everything BEFORE the end of the semester. I was all prepared to do so, too, until these four presentations popped up at the last second. Now I have four weeks left of the semester and I'm starting to feel distressed.

It's a little more complicated that how I've explained, to be honest. We were supposed to have a term paper in my semiotics class, but the professor wants everyone to do the same poem/movie and turn it in a week earlier? And she's calling it a presentation? I don't really understand what's going on with that to be honest. My Korean Lit History class was supposed to have two presentations, but the professor canceled one of them today, so I'm down to one... which I'm not complaining about.

Let's do a review of my final papers/presentations.
Korean Lit History: presentation on 이상 and 거울 next week; final paper on the same poem due Dec. 19. (I was originally going to do a presentation and therefore my final paper on 김유정의 안해, but since the presentation was canceled, I'm stuck with 이상.... ugh) My final paper will probably be a comparison of 거울 and a western Surrealism poem, or a semiotic analysis of the poem. 거울 because I'll be doing a paper on it in my Semiotics class, and it would be nice to have the background in it before hand/to cut down on the amount of work I have to do.

Semiotics: 이상의 거울 presentation/paper? I guess? I need to contact the professor and ask what exactly the final paper requires... Not necessarily due during finals week, but maybe? And no clue as to the length. I thought we had to choose our own topic and go from there, but I guess the professor decided for us? So vague. (So Korean.)

Modern Korean Poetry: 기형도의 시에 나타난 멜랑콜리아... I've spent a lot of time trying to research melancholia, and this morning I finally found a source that will help me tie everything together. I have to bring in "what I've completed so far" next week, so that gives me a deadline to get a good portion of it done by- and it's also the paper that will be due the latest of them all, on Dec. the 19th, so we'll see if I can finish that sucker early... hopefully this week, to be honest. The stressful part is the philosophy reading; the analyzing won't be too bad.

Korean Literature Criticism: This is my undergrad class. I'm going to write about 젠더와 폭력 in 한강의 채식주의자와 공지영의 우리들의 행복한 시간. I have the paper completely outlined and since the class is pass/fail, I'm not going to dwell too much on it. I want to write the entire fucker next week and get it out of the way.

Class was canceled tomorrow (Tuesday) and Wednesday, and I don't have class Thursdays, so I plan to write the FUCK out of my papers this week. Do the entirety of my 이상 발표 and do the introduction and 방법론 for my 멜랑콜리아 papers if at all possible. I've been having trouble making myself study, but I'm kind of running out of time, so I don't have much of an option.

Here's my rough plan: next week will be the gender and violence paper... the following week I'll work on the semiotics presentation/paper... the week after I'll do the 이상 surrealism paper... and then finals week I'll do the melancholia paper and be done with all of this nonsense. It doesn't sound as daunting when I write it down like this, but this all depends a LOT on my motivation- or lack thereof...

I guess what it comes down to is... well... I don't want to be super fucking stressed the last couple weeks of the semester. Last semester was awful. Mildly stressed is fine, whatever, I can deal with that. But I have so goddamn much to do that I absolutely do NOT want to be more stressed than necessary. If I can just get myself started I will be able to knock out these papers, no problem. But that's the whole issue... :(
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    스트레스 시작......