April 18th, 2004

this is me

they show you everything.

i don't think it's possible for anyone to know how much i want to write another novel.

how much i need to write another novel.

i have so many emotions and feelings and thoughts that just need to be released. i need an escape.

sure, my last novel nearly drove me insane, but it was an incredibly cathartic way to release everything. i felt empty upon completing it - but now i realize that that emptiness was not due to being aware that i had nothing to do, but because i was able to write everything that i had ever wanted to up until that point.

and now i am full to the brim, almost overflowing, with everything i need to say and speak and share and you know.

are you aware when you just stare for hours into the sky?
what do you see? can you show it to me?
the beauty.
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    Duncan Sheik - Shine Inside