January 26th, 2004

this is me

everyone keeps asking, "what's it all about?"

'cause i am barely breathing
and i can't find the air
i don't know who i'm kidding
imagining you care
and i could stand here, waiting
a fool for another day
but i don't suppose it's worth the price -
worth the price -
the price that i would pay

I'm doing pretty good. I had a slight mental breakdown about two hours ago (Chemistry final tomorrow oh my God I'm going to get a B in the goddamn class why the fuck do I bother), since I have that stupid final and Mr. Voldemort still hasn't given me my grade. I'm assuming it's the worst case scenario, since that is just the way my mind works.

If my grades suck ass for first semester (worst case), then my semester GPA will still be 3.167. If it all works out, 3.5. Gee, I wonder which I'd prefer.

I'm beginning to dislike my hair. It getting fairly long, and I hate it. However, I want to see how long it will get after a year of no cutting... I just have to wait for about six more months. Actually, I want to avoid dyeing it, since I hate the roots, though the roots that result from black hair aren't too bad.

For the time being, I'm avoiding Schol-Bowl and socializing. I've been so wildly depressed recently that I would probably go homicidal and kill everyone if I have to be around them for that long. Or, uh, I just want to wallow. Whichever it is, I'm not going. Sorry.

i only taste the saline
when i kiss away your tears...
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    Duncan Sheik - Reasons for Living