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공부에 대해서

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December 12, 2015 | 09:03pm
Mood: ashamed, kinda?

I have roughly 1.5 weeks left before my final papers are due and here I am sitting in front of my computer, not writing them.

What the hell is wrong with me? I did some research for about 2 hours today, wrote a paragraph, and decided to come back to it later. I still haven't done any more work.

I am feeling kind of like... blah. Honestly, when the words come, it's a great feeling. But I'm having trouble understand the novels I'm writing about. I'm having trouble analyzing them. I'm having trouble writing down my thoughts in Korean OR English. I'm having trouble finding the motivation to just do my damn work. It's kind of getting to the point where it doesn't even matter what I write, just as long as I write SOMETHING.

I have to admit: I'm starting to wonder if graduate school is for me. Or rather- I think it very well could be for me, but perhaps not this major. You know, I wanted to do this program in an attempt to improve my Korean... I don't know if this is working out for me. (I could just be saying this because I'm having trouble doing my damn work. Who knows?)

When it comes down to it, I am a lazy sack of shit and I need to shut the fuck up and WRITE. That being said, I'll probably go to bed early tonight and try to force myself to do something productive tomorrow. If I can make a lot of progress tomorrow I'd be happy - especially if it could make up for the disaster that was today. Like, seriously, the sooner I finish these papers, the sooner I can just go on vacation...

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