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개강, 수업의 첫인상과 내 낮은 한국어 실력

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September 9, 2015 | 09:54pm
Mood: 우울함

Week 1.5 of graduate school is done. After no small amount of drama (discovering that I had to take undergraduate level prerequisite classes, for one), I signed up for classes and proceeded to miss a grand total of half my classes the first week due to not realizing that I wasn't actually going to take some of them.

Class overview.

Mondays: 고전시가연구. Classical Korean Poetry. Supposedly no hanja (classical Korean, written in Chinese) is required, but considering how most of the words aren't in modern dictionaries, I feel like this is inaccurate. I am doomed and currently avoiding reading what needs to be done for next week... not that I don't know exactly what needs to be read... did I mention I'm doomed?

Tuesdays: 현대시교육론 (선수과목). Modern Korean Poetry Educational Theory. This is the undergraduate prerequisite class; it's educational theory because the department doesn't have a department dedicated solely to Korean literature at the undergraduate level. It's ok, I suppose. I don't understand everything and the professor talks at the speed of sound, so that's a thing.

Wednesdays: 현대소설연구. Modern Novel. This is the class I wanted to do well in, and I'm proving myself to be absolute shit. I didn't read the original version of the novel for the week; instead I read the updated version (which needs to be read for next week, apparently? But I don't recall the professor mentioning this...). I try to speak or get my point out and the professor is just, "Huh?" I feel like a moron.

Thursdays: 현대문학교육론. Modern Korean Literature Educational Theory. The same professor as the Tuesday class; he recommended that I take this class because it'll be a slightly easier level. It's okay I guess.

No class Fridays through Sundays.

So here's my first impression: my Korean skills are nowhere near good enough. No joke. I am certainly capable of reading a novel in Korean (in a week!) and I could probably even analyze it, but my speaking skills... are so bad... I'm honestly ashamed. I sit there in class and when the professors call on me, I just say, "Huh?" I can't even get out a grammatically correct sentence. I don't understand what's wrong with me. I'm capable of speaking Korean! Not super well, but I am capable of it! I am so frustrated.

I keep thinking... well, a lot of things, honestly. I don't think I've made the right decision as to majors, but - and this is a big but - if I keep up with it, my skills may improve. And if they improve, I'll be capable of some great things. I'm just having trouble because I'm at the starting stages, and I can't see the forest for the trees. It's not so much that I'm regretting my decision (okay, I'm regretting the Classical Korean Poetry class, to be honest), but... I don't know.

Anyways, I wrote my first paper today (For the Modern Korean Lit Ed. Theory class) and then I spent over an hour fighting with my new printer to print it and the 1960 version of the book I have to read for my novel class next week.

Oh, and a couple more interesting things: there are 3 master's degree students in my Korean lit major (possibly 4, but nobody has seen the fourth at all...) and I'm the only new student. Also, we had a department opening ceremony/dinner last week, which was incredibly awkward. It's like I'm a real Korean student, guys! Only, without halfway decent Korean skills. Fail.개

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