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1995 + 1997

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April 25, 2010 | 10:04pm
Mood: fed up
Music: Yeasayer - Love Me Girl

Yesterday I went to Korean class, learned verbs, went out for lunch with Megan, Zandra, and a couple of Z's classmates, and then the three of us went shopping. I ended up buying a sweater that doesn't (and will never) fit and a murse I rather like. Later there was drinking at Kylee's, followed by going downtown. I drank a shitload of beer, got ridiculously depressed soon after we ended up downtown, and didn't snap out of it until sometime this afternoon. Considering how rotten I felt I really shouldn't have stayed as long as I did. I should've just gotten up and left. Oh well, can't do anything about it now.

Today I woke up early, sat around editing photos for a few hours, and went for lunch with Jodi, Kylee, and Dennis (a former teacher at my school). After lunch Jodi and I sat in the park for a few hours talking about going to Australia for Christmas and watching kids set off fireworks. Then I went for duck shabu with Megan, Nigel, and Zandra. I'm currently sitting home alone listening to the bass in the guitar bar and contemplating shooting myself in the head.

I've been trying to upload photos to Facebook for the last few hours but the upload keeps failing. Getting frustrated.

Whenever I see a certain person they always comment on my weight: "You look so good now! You're so skinny! Eat a cheeseburger and put some meat on those bones!" I don't know if I'm flattered or pissed off by this comment. I mean, yeah, I'm skinnier than I was when I got here, and that's kind of the goal, but saying it like that is kind of insulting, you know? I mean, I don't like to be the center of attention. Comments like that just makes everyone look at me and I'm still stuck in that fat kid mindset. I can't help but think of my faults.

I'm worried about the political situation in Thailand, but I figure - worse-case scenario, I go to Singapore and Malaysia. In September I intend to go to Russia (Khabarovsk/maybe Vladivostok/miscellaneous small towns). Plans may change, but you're welcome to come.

There's really no need to be an asshole.

My nose is sunburnt.

I may go to Woodstock Korea later this year.

I did pull-ups earlier today. I am ridiculously pleased with myself.

Regarding my bad mood: there are some things I could do that could help, but all of them are nigh-impossible at this point in time. That's what it comes down to.

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Comments {6}

Tess

(no subject)

from: mintsonpillows
date: April 25, 2010 04:07pm (UTC)
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I would have just taken it as a compliment and moved on you know? It takes too much time to think about things like that and it would be different if you weren't working on it daily.

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Adam

(no subject)

from: aodh
date: April 25, 2010 11:41pm (UTC)
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I get that it's a compliment... but there's something about the way they put it that I have a problem with. oh well. whatever.

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Tried

from: anonymous
date: April 25, 2010 04:36pm (UTC)
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The Guitar bar ignored my calls to their land line-
I left a message..
Mr Guitar bar ignored my calls to his cellphone-
I will talk to Paul about it tomorrow.

Not resolved soon - there's a switch in the stairwell that will cut off their power I think.

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Adam

Re: Tried

from: aodh
date: April 25, 2010 11:40pm (UTC)
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I stomped on the floor at maybe 10pm last night and I got a stomp back, so I think they were there at that time. But the music is still going now at 8:40am. Fucking ridiculous. I was going to talk to Paul today as well.

The bass has only happened the last two Sundays, but that's two Sundays too many.

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antigone_k

(no subject)

from: antigone_k
date: April 25, 2010 04:43pm (UTC)
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I really hate it when people comment about my losing weight. It always seems like a back-handed compliment, like they thought I was fat before, or that I somehow *should* be really flattered to be told that I lost weight. Intellectually, I know that these are the sorts of people that just go around saying stuff like that because that's what *they* would like to hear, but emotionally, it makes me uncomfortable and self-conscious.

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Adam

(no subject)

from: aodh
date: April 25, 2010 11:45pm (UTC)
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That's exactly how I feel, but wasn't able to explain. Although-- there are times when and certain people from whom I do appreciate compliments regarding my weight/appearance, but this person... not so much.

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