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너무 좋지 않은 일주일

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November 24, 2016 | 08:05pm
Mood: frustrated

This week though... ay yi yi.

So I had all these grand plans of working on all my papers/presentations this week, right? Well, Tuesday morning I got up, went to the gym, came home, and was suddenly just... out of it. I usually pace around my apartment in an attempt to get steps, but I was so worn out and tired I couldn't even make myself stay standing for more than a couple minutes at a time.

It got worse and worse; as the day progressed I started to get hot and cold flashes, a bad headache, and I felt like I was going to puke. I forced myself to set up and work on my paper for about 30 minutes in the afternoon, but found myself too out of it to do any good so I went back to bed. I was at my worst at about 4:30pm, took an hour long nap, and found myself feeling a bit better. I forced myself to go out to get food from the convenience store and I managed to break my fever by being outside in the cold weather. I took a cold shower and more or less felt back to normal by 8pm. A big waste of a day.

Wednesday I made a little progress on my paper. Very little. I found a lot of sources but didn't do much with them. I did meet up with Ted in the evening and we got pajeon and coffee, so that was good.

Today... well, I managed to make a lot of progress on my paper. But like, it's not very good. I kind of just regurgitated everything I read in modified Korean, more or less cribbing it all. I don't really know how else to do it though, honestly? I'm not quite done, but it's Thanksgiving, goddammit, so I'm calling it quits for the day. I only have another page left to write, so as long as I force myself to sit down and do some work on it tomorrow I'll be good to go. I don't really think the presentation itself is super important though, to be honest. I think what's more important- especially for me right now- is that I build enough of a base/background knowledge in Korean surrealism/dadaism and Yi Sang's poetry that I can produce two final papers on it in the next few weeks. I... don't necessarily know if that's what I'm doing, but I'm goddamn well trying. Anyways, if I can finish it tomorrow, that'll give me the weekend to work on the melancholia paper, which should be immensely easier. Well, maybe. Sorta. Kinda. Ugh.

Anyways, today is Thanksgiving and I had leftover pajeon for breakfast and ordered Chinese food for dinner. How American is that, right? Eating Korean-style Chinese food for an American holiday. I mean, if I can't celebrate the holiday with turkey, may as well go for the second best option, amirite?

Oh, and in other news, the ointment I got to use instead of getting another surgical procedure... well, I think it's working. It's working insofar as it's basically so strong that it's chemically burning off the skin on my nether regions. And all I'm thinking is just, "Could be worse, could be bleeding again." How sick is that? 2016, you guys. The year where everything has been such shit that I am nonchalant and cool with this entire process. Christ.

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