la vita è

Total fail: 0 hours of sleep last night, you guys. Maybe 1 hour, max. I would drift off and promptly wake up coughing, which would proceed to keep me up for the next hour. I ran out of cough drops around 4am.

My feet are also killing me.

Why is my body failing me so much these days?

Today is a nice, short day. I can do it. Really. If I say it enough maybe it'll come true.

Last Friday I had a 3rd date with YJ. We got coffee, saw Dark Shadows (which was above average, surprisingly), and went to a coffee shop until 1:30am. Then we came back to my place.

This weekend I did fuck all. Some of my friends went to Jeju, others went to Wando, and I stayed at home alone. It was a nice, relaxing weekend. I did, however, spend the entire weekend sick with a cold which I still have today: I can barely make it through the day with my voice intact, and today I lost it.

One of my coworkers pulled a runner so a lot of us are filling classes until he's replaced. I only picked up one class. Another coworker wasn't at work today so I picked up one of her classes as well. Since I was already maxed out on hours, I get overtime pay. This is the first time in the 2.5 years I've been teaching that I get overtime pay. I'll get be getting about 100,000won more than usual for the month. SO not complaining.

I'm giving a test on Friday and I'm a little nervous. It's not as easy as the last test, and I want the kids to do well... at least I figured out a way to grade it out of 100 points so the percentages will work out nicely. :)

Today was Teacher's Day. I received: a box of chocolate, a nice travel mug, a candle, expensive body wash, a pin, a pen in the shape of a rose, an actual rose, and a variety of notes. Some of the notes were pretty priceless: "You are my favorite teacher and Science is my favorite class!" "Teacher, you are so cute and handsome!! (Sorry teacher!!)" This job is good for my ego.

The next chapter in our textbook is about geology/the earth. I have 2.5 months to do the next 2 chapters of my textbook, so I intend on doing a shitload of activities. The kids will make their own volcanic eruptions, make their own tornadoes, play with clay to make landforms, rub ice together to make glaciers... this shit is going to be awesome.

( Travel thoughts. )

I really need to get a hobby. Or, more specifically, I really need to get back into studying Korean.

I finish work at 4:30. I eat some shitty dinner which I'm usually finished eating by 6pm. Then I sit around and read/do fuck-all until 10pm or pass out, whichever comes first. If I could make myself sit down and do some Korean grammar practice for an hour a night I wouldn't be so bored all the time.

Realization/decision: duly noted.
Likelihood of it happening: not so great.

Seriously though. Once I've finished work I spend my time doing nothing. Absolutely nothing. I know how pathetic this is.

Third date will be Friday night, followed by a fourth date sometime this weekend. We're talking every day, but we don't necessarily talk about anything. I feel as if we should be having some grand conversation, which is silly, because MQ and I never did. Of course, we couldn't speak the same language, either. YJ/Phillip (as he will henceforth and in the future be known in this journal) speaks great English. Maybe I should introduce him to my sense of humor?

Anyways, it's a good thing I have a couple dates this weekend, because otherwise I'd be spending it alone doing nothing, just like every other day of my godforsaken life.

What do other people do in their spare time? Something more entertaining than what I do, apparently.


Contemplating moving to a new country. Maybe I'm just bored with Korea. I don't know.

Date #2 went well, although it resulted in a lack of sleep on my part. (No sexy shenanigans occurred; I just got to bed late.)

Not only have my feet been killing me, but today I successfully managed to fall up stairs, resulting in a giant bruise on one shin and a hard bruise on my knee. My fall was so tremendous that a second grader stopped and said, "Teacher, are you okay?" I can barely walk you guys. I'm 25 years old and I'm already hobbling around. Ridiculous.

I just wanted to record this for posterity: breakfast today was a serving of pineapples, strawberries, and a banana. Lunch was all vegetarian with an apple. Dinner was absolute unhealthy shit. 2/3rds of my meals are healthy. Why can't I successfully defeat the dinner monster?

"We made plans to have some beer together sometime, or go bowling."

"Man, most people would think gay guys would go on chic or stylish dates, you know?"

"..."

"I mean, it sounds like you guys are just a couple of guys hanging out. Not going on a date."
- a midnight discussion between a sober me and a drunken Misty


Today I spent a few hours talking with The Guy With Whom I Went On A Date Yesterday. Or rather, we texted sporadically all day. We have a lot in common. We have another date tomorrow and plans next weekend.

I dunno, I'm just going with the flow.

Sometimes I go to the fridge and take a sip of all of the different beverages inside. Just one sip of each. Then I close the door and go back to doing what I was doing before.

I wonder if I'm the only person who does this.

Thursday night a random guy messaged me on the app using nearly-perfect English. It turns out he'd spent a couple years studying English in New Zealand. We messaged until 1:30am (about 4 hours) and then I went to sleep. Friday we messaged throughout the day and made plans to get coffee on Sunday.

Today I wasn't planning to do anything in an attempt to rest my foot - which I've determined to be due to my Achilles tendon - when he messaged, "Wanna get coffee?"

"Sure," I said.

I proceeded to miss my bus and the next bus never came, so I took a taxi. I then got off at the wrong street, and walked in the wrong direction, and then started walking in the right direction when he stumbled across me. We had coffee and walked all over the place (my feet only gave a few twinges, luckily!), went on a 4D ride, and came back to my place, where we--

Watched music videos. With the exception of occasionally brushing hands, nothing happened except a hug at the end. While waiting for a taxi, we made plans to go bowling in the near future.

I don't necessarily know if this was a date or not (it probably was), and there was a lot of silence (not necessarily awkward, but not necessarily comfortable...), but it was a good time. He's a really nice guy with a personality and interests that don't necessarily fit in Korea, he's attractive, and his body doesn't fit the Korean-stereotype. I appreciate the fact that I was able to hang out with a guy and nothing happened on the first date. I really appreciate that, actually.

That's a thought: every first date from now on I'll invite the guy back to my place. If nothing happens, he has potential as a future boyfriend. It's a brilliant idea, right? Right?

... Bueller?

EXCITING DATING DEVELOPMENTS OF THE DAY:

(1) a 23 year old gay who works at a hagwon in Kumho-dong messaged me. Unfortunately, at 169cm, he's a pocket gay. Too short.

(2) Totally built 24 year old Chosun Engineering student has great potential. AND he plays the guitar. I approve.

(3) 30 year old religious coffee shop owner (with whom I had a date earlier this week) continues to message me. I don't know how I feel about this.

(4) Random guy in Mokpo messaged me. We have a nice conversation, and then he tells me that his boyfriend hates Korea and can't wait to leave. "Why would foreigners hate it here?" he asked in a plaintive tone (if social networking messages could be described as plaintive). I explain: maybe they don't like the food, or the people aren't friendly, or they hate their job, or they miss home. He replies, "Oh, I understand. I'm so sad. Thank you very much. I'm sorry for bothering you." Much like a prostitute, I am the person guys come to for therapy.

(5) Finally, the entire reason I started writing this: a guy who speaks great English and lives less than a kilometer away messaged me. He seems normal enough (although he is also a pocket gay). Then he said, "My name is Min Kyu. It's nice to meet you~"

(facedesk)

It's kind of funny, in a sad way.

There are a few others, but these are the only ones for whom I can think of anything witty to say.

Hmm. A lot has happened in the last couple of days.

Saturday night MQ and I broke up. It wasn't necessarily a surprise - it's been on the horizon for some time - but it wasn't pleasant. I ended up going to Vanessa's, where I got horribly drunk and found out a lot of, ah, interesting things about my friends, and then downtown. I went straight to the gay bars at 1am where I spent a few hours talking with a nice military guy and singing karaoke together.

Sunday I was dead all day. Bad, bad hangover. I was just about to step out the door to meet Megan for a late lunch/early dinner at 3:25 when I went to puke. Oy. I still made it out, and puking made me feel better, but still. Total waste of a day.

Today I got my hair cut. I've been saving it for when I could meet Minkyu - I was going to treat it as a birthday present - but whatever. The cut isn't exactly what I wanted, but it's ok, but the stylist worked some magic with gel and now I have to figure out what I'm going to do with it. Do I put effort into my hair or not? :(

I downloaded a gay app on my phone and within 24 hours I received messages from 21 different guys. Are there more homos in this city than there used to be, or is showing a modicum of Korean ability reason enough to open doors? I don't know. Most are ignoring my plea of, "Friends or relationship only," but whatever. Of those 21 guys (more now, actually) I've narrowed it down to three who actually have potential. This doesn't mean I've found a new boyfriend yet or anything, but these three aren't starting a conversation with, "Are you a top or a bottom?" or "I want to see you at your house tomorrow~!^^" Eh, we'll see.

Here's the thing: thinking about dating makes me unhappy. By this I mean, "Fuck, I have to go through that shit again. Fuuuck." In spite of my new dating profile I don't necessarily want a boyfriend or sex or a relationship or anything right now. I just... want to meet new people and practice Korean. If something happens, then hooray. If not... oh well.

You guys, I just realized something: I think I've grown up.

Last week I was stupidly busy all week. This week I hardly teach. I just broke out my e-book reader... I've already prepared for my classes and the science festival this week so now I'm going to get a little reading out of the way as well.

I'm not complaining about getting breaks. I just wish they fell during a week in which I could actually use the time off.